My Response to Why We Ride

My little girl on my first bike after returning.

I’m very sporadic with my blogging. It’s a bit like riding for pleasure really. I don’t do enough of either. Work! That’s something I don’t do enough of. Spending time with my kids, yeah, that too if I’m honest. One way or another, someone will be able to read this blog and want to criticise me on one count if not many, of getting the balance utterly wrong. So as I type this, I’m still not sure I am brave enough to publish it. There you go. Into complete.

Last night I watched ‘Why We Ride (2013).’ I lack the vocabulary to say how good it was, how good it made me feel. It took me a while to work out why it made me feel good but I think I’m there now. I know I’m a motorcyclist, a biker. The film was all about us and what we are like. It was about our hopes and dreams, what makes us tick. Diversity is a key feature throughout: different bikes, different activities, different parts of the world and most importantly, different people. From children and young families to an 87 year old woman hoping she’ll still ride at 100, the film seemed to be about amazing people from all walks of life. And yet, for all the diversity there was a oneness. Motorcyclists in their many forms come together as one rich community. The film made me feel good because I’m part of that.

Recently, my friend Jim got his first bike. It happened that he bought it home just as my Half Term Break was starting so, obviously, we had to go out. Even Kev, who’s bike is usually in hibernation 9 months of the year, turned out. We pottered around local roads for the morning and stopped for tea before returning home in time for lunch and whatever else. It wasn't much and it wasn't long but it was great. I really enjoyed myself.

Then, this morning, I was coming to work. I treated myself to riding the VStrom and going a fairly roundabout way. How could I not after watching that film. Riding gives one time to think and before long I was thinking about family and friends. I've often wondered how long it will be before Beth can safely reach the pegs on the bike. Perhaps we should look into an electric bike for the kids to get started on. Sidecar outfits always cross my mind but they never stay long. I wondered that today. I try not to think it out loud in case mum can hear. As she reads this blog, I should probably wonder it no more.

Carrying pillion makes for time together. Separate bikes would also be good.

In the meantime though, what we could do for sure is plan a ride with friends where even if children can’t come, at least Ang could. After getting a suitable amount of work done, I decided to write out a sort of itinerary. It would be intended to encourage people (Jim, Kev, Angie and perhaps even a few pillions) to set a date for a day of being motorcycle enthusiasts together. The route it a triumph! Any other ‘me’ would agree for sure. It has great roads to push your bike on, remote roads to enjoy the beauty of creation and regular stops where you can natter and drink tea. It’s a perfect day, if you’re me and with someone willing to put yourself in my capable hands as guide. Unfortunately, if you’re just me then it’s all that but without being sure of a friendly face to natter with during stops.

And that’s kind of where we come back to the community. I’m not a lone wolf and most motorcyclist I know and respect aren't either. Their bikes aren't just toys, they’re a starting point for relationships with other like-minded human beings. That’s also sort of why I write in my blog, hoping that I might meet other like-minded folk and natter (in which the blog has been singularly unsuccessful for me). I don’t want to ride alone anywhere near as much as I would love to enjoy motorcycling with others. That could be friends; it could be family or just some other chap who also happened to be there. The friends and family option though, obviously that is the platinum standard. I never wanted motorcycles to take me away from the people and love and care about and the more I think about it, the more I think it shouldn't have to.

Six year into parenthood and there are promising signs.

Now, I have no choice but to look forward and figure out where I go from here. We had a ‘discussion’ about work life balance the other day but it was really about work/family life balance. I need to see more of my family and less of my desk. I’d be lying if I didn't say I want to spend more time with my friends as well. Watching Why We Ride left me thinking we can do that because it featured young families that were passionate about bikes. It wasn't just something that started at 17+ and had to be hidden from parents. So now I’m not wondering, I’m planning. 

Never Missed a Beat

I recently claimed that Angie's YBR125 'never misses a beat.' Well guess what: spoiler alert!

It missed it's first beat on a soaking wet, icy cold Monday. I thought little of it. Nearing work after a clear run, I gently rolled over the bridge and disengaged the clutch as I came to a halt. The motor stopped! It started right up again so I assumed it was me being a bit useless. Saying that, it was idling a little low, perhaps 1200. That was it though, until the end of the week.

The week dragged on and when the final bell rang on Friday, it felt a few days overdue. The ringing was somewhat drowned out by rain drumming on the skylights. Fed up and tired, what I want wanted to do was get on my bike and ride. What I didn't want was to get soaked through only to arrive home at the moment storm clouds gave way to bright blue sky. Thus daylight gave way to indecision.

By the time I left, there was virtually no light and still plenty of rain. The YBR125's single 35w/35w lamp is already useless in the face of oncoming traffic. The heavy cloud annihilated what little twilight remained and I was fighting a loosing battle to clear my visor. In such situations you're pretty much riding on a wing and a prayer when anything but a YBR125 comes the other way.

Not five minutes in and already soaked, I met a particularly well lit car coming mid road. Obviously I slowed right down and aimed for the darkness left of the blinding headlights. That's when the engine stopped. Instinctively I thumbed the starter but this time it didn't start right back up. “Oh great!” (possibly words to that effect)

After I pushing to a nearby driveway, it started up again so I rode off but with confidence in the bike utterly lost. Anyone who's been there knows how it affects your riding. Loosing confidence in your bike on a dark, blustery and wet night isn't quite a nightmare but it's super stressful. I soon found that the engine would cut out at speeds over 50 if on full throttle.

Anyone who rides a YBR will know that any slope means full throttle at speeds of over 50. Anyone who rides a YBR around these parts will know that we don't really have roads that aren't sloped one way or t'other. Only your wrist notices them on a big bike. Generally, there's way more thinking involved in getting a learner bike from Harrogate to Ilkley. Each gear change is anticipated well in advance so, ideally, timed to perfection. When you roll on to full and find the motor cuts, blood pressure rises just as fast as the oil pressure drops.

Thankfully I got it home. I've since washed it and can't find anything looking like the culprit. Stand back a bit while you're hosing it off and that bike looks fairly new. However, get in close with the sponge and a soapy paint brush, it starts looking long in the tooth for sure. The swinging arm and parts of the frame are rusting heavily along with the whole exhaust system. The whole rear end could do with pulling apart, stripping back to the bare metal and painting. I might do all that. I thought I might do that last summer. It really needs it now so I really might. Then again, I might not.

One thing's for sure, the bike I once trusted to the point of abuse can never again be described as having 'never missed a beat.' Now it needs some Alan time. He'll probably tell me off about one thing or another but I know we'll most likely get it back in a fit state to see the winter out. That way when spring starts getting serious I'll be able to ride it to work just like I could when I filmed this two years ago.

Hibernating Hamish

This is winter, often referred to as the off season by groups such as surfers, dinghy sailors and of course motorcyclists. While our dinghy is safely de-rigged and sitting on old tyres with it’s keel in the air, my bike doesn't get the same treatment, or at least it didn't used to. Unfortunately, Hamish the WeeStrom will have to go into partial hibernation.

Looking back through old blog posts, you can see Wee Hamish had a hard winter in 13/14. This time last year there were sticking brakes and (unrelated) sliding through the snow, shiny side down. This winter I wanted to ride through, enjoying the comfort and protection offered by the best bike I've ever owned while remaining willing to take the car if there was call for it. After all, now we have the Fiat Panda, driving to work isn't actually all that expensive. It’s just that it doesn't do anything for the soul.

It didn't come as any surprise when the brakes started binding again. For a start, I’m pretty sure I didn't do a great job overhauling them last year. The roads were also pretty heavily gritted, evidenced by the huge build up of crud on just about every part of the bike. I've been using the Scott Oiler stuff to try and protect the bike but there seems to be nothing you can do to protect the brake calipers. Apparently this is a well known problem with these calipers and Bandit and SV owners all suffer the same way.

Having learned my lesson, I decided to park the bike up and book it in with Alan. I've got to the point now where I understand that £60 of his time and lubricants is more valuable than a months worth of me making a mess of things. For £60 Alan was able to free off and tidy up the front calipers, make the stand spring back like they actually mean it, cleaned up the rear caliper, correctly adjust the chain, tyre pressures and the clutch. That’s probably five or six hours of me not quite doing the job right verses £60 and time to sit in a coffee shop reading Ride magazine before riding away on a bike that feel right and trustworthy.  Maybe I’m getting old. Possibly I’m not a real man anymore. Just maybe it’s a no-brainer.

Unfortunately it wasn't all good news. One piston on one caliper has pushed out a dust seal. It’s safe to ride and not the end of the world. Alan packed it with grease and tells me I’ll be fine for a few months. It’s not that I don’t trust him either. There’s just something about those front brakes that attracts crud and I don’t want to not have a working bike when Spring get here.

Thus, Wee Hamish goes onto light duties.My daily commute, once again, falls to Angie’s YBR125. I never saw myself as a man who had a winter hack. Fair play to it though, that YBR never skips a beat. Sure I've had to take bits off to add more grease because Lord knows, Yamaha don’t like getting those moving parts all greasy in the factory. I've also had to tighten just about every nut and bolt up at one point or another. Unlike my bike, which makes it pretty clear when I've done a bad job of something, the YBR is fairly immune to my attentions. With it only sniffing at petrol, there’s an extra few quid to spend on bits for Wee Hamish as well!

Thus I have an moral dilemma on my hands. I was abstaining from unnecessary use of petrol last year during Lent. It was an actual commitment that made a difference in many ways so naturally, I was going to do it again. The problem is, Easter’s unusually late this year. When Lent hits we’ll be looking at bringing Wee Hamish out to run rings around those fair weather bikers still getting their legs back after a winter of riding a sofa.

Can I bring Lent forward? If not, I would be riding the YBR all the way to late April. Tough call! I may need to give something else up for part of Lent.

Motorcycle Adventure Media - Part 1 - Dirt Track Productions

My two weeks are nearly up. That’s to say, a while ago I made a personal commitment to post at least every two weeks. Two weeks have now passed without a post. I’m not going to claim a lack of time. It was inspiration that was lacking. All I’ve been up to is riding to and from work, sometimes on the Wee, sometimes on the YBR125. Once I got to work to early so I wandered up to the Cow and Calf Rocks and took a picture or two. That’s it though. My life has been more about skipping festivals and choir competitions that bike based adventure so I’ve gone elsewhere as usual. That’s today’s inspiration. I’m going to write briefly (in three or four parts) about where I get my fix.

First up are two films by the one man film unit, Gaurav Jani of Dirt Track Productions. If first discovered Riding Solo to the Top Of The World when browsing the Rufforth Autojumble. I must have been feeling rich because I paid £20 for a DVD, not something I do often. I’m glad I did. It’s fantastic. His trip to to one of the remotest places in the world, the Changthang Plateau in Ladakh, aboard an Enfield Bullet is so atmospheric that I find myself watching it over and over again, dipping in and out as I get on with work. Sometimes I wonder if I should separate the sound track with the steady thudding of the archaic bikes engine so I can listen to it when I’m struggling for sleep as it seems to chill me right out.

His films aren’t just about riding. They are also about the people and communities he encounters. Riding Solo is so good, I actually use it in geography lessons when we study contrasting localities. The children are always fascinated until they are shown how the Chang pas make their butter. At that point they are suitably ‘grossed out’. You’ll have to watch it to find out why. However, when offered the chance to watch the rest during wet play times, they usually sit quietly mesmerized. Here's the trailer.

In his second film, One Crazy Ride, Gaurav Jani travels with friends from his club searching for a route they are told no longer exists, still riding Enfield bullets. It’s very different because it’s about a group of people all of whom are riding bikes though challenging and beautiful landscapes on frankly unsuitable bikes. The Bullets are forever breaking down, seemingly more due to their archaic design than the awful or non existent roads. Though there is a bit about the communities they travel through, it’s much more about the ride.Here's the trailer.

If I absolutely had to choose which one to take with me to a desert island, it would be tough. I think I’d end up going for Riding Solo. In truth though, I’m ready for more, so ready I even paid another twenty quid towards the making of the next film, described as a sort of Part 2 to Riding Solo. Motorcycle Chang pa is in post production now but the forecast release date seems to keep slipping back. Hopefully it will be ready in 2013 some time. I can’t wait for the next one which says all that really needs to be said about the films of Gaurave Jani and Dirt Track Productions. I'd recommend these to anyone, motorcyclist or not, just as long as they are remotely interested in travel or the rest of the world. Here's the teaser for the much anticipated Motorcycle Chang pa.

And with that I’ve written enough. In part 2 I get my fix from another Blog. Maybe a couple of blogs.

The Joys Of Spring

Doubtless if there is a definitive set of rules setting out what should and should not be blogged about,‭ ‬moaning about weather would be there under the heading,‭ '‬Not unless you want to bore your readers to death.‭' ‬Well,‭ ‬I guess dear reader,‭ ‬it's time to get your affairs in order.‭ ‬Sorry.

My wife.
Most weather biker.
All weather knitter.

To be fair though,‭ ‬as motorcyclists (‬I'm making an assumption there but it's pretty well founded so forgive me if you aren't‭) ‬weather has more impact on us than it does on those prone to many other pursuits.‭ ‬I'm pretty sure high winds, snow, torrential rain and freezing fog have never prevented my wife sewing up a sock monkey (‬google it if you must‭) or knitting a scarf for one of our children’s many stuffed dogs‬.‭ ‬Saying that,‭ ‬she doesn't blog so I guess there's no issue there.

However,‭ ‬those of us in the upper bits of the northern hemisphere,‭ ‬particularly in the UK,‭ are a little less weather aware now because at long last, this is ‬Spring.‭ ‬Oh happy day(s‭)! ‬Motorcycles are coming out of hibernation,‭ ‬their riders a little rusty,‭ ‬their batteries a little dead.‭ ‬My mate is one of them.‭ ‬We rode together for the first time a few days back.‭ ‬It was an impromptu Friday afternoon ride,‭ ‬ organised (‬I use the term loosly‭) ‬at the last moment.‭ ‬We pretty much just went to Squires to play look at bikes and the people that ride them.‭ ‬We certainly didn't go for the tea which is believed to be the worst in this world and probably those we have yet to explore.‭

Not this ride out but one years ago when I still had my CG125.
Kev still has that CBR but more a few more scratches these days.

But here's the cool part.‭ ‬Here's the part where all that cold,‭ ‬unsettled winter riding comes good.‭ ‬Sure,‭ ‬I looked into my mirrors to see Kev wasn't keeping up in the twisty bits.‭ ‬I wasn't pushing myself or the bike,‭ ‬just riding to the available grip with consideration for the vanishing point,‭ ‬as you do.‭ ‬Still,‭ ‬it wasn't like Kev to not stay with me where the road gets curvy.‭ ‬He's rusty.‭ ‬I get it.‭ ‬Soon he'll be back to scraping the pegs and howling off into the distance on his‭ ‬11‭ ‬year old CBR600F.‭ ‬Then,‭ ‬I looked down.‭

It turns out that a winter of searching for every last gram of grip leaves you more than ready for the day when the tarmac warms up and the rain that washed the gravel from the perfect line has nicely dried up.‭ ‬When that day comes,‭ ‬you look down and that tarmac is a whole lot closer than you've seen it for a while.‭ ‬Normally you only see it this close when you fall of in the snow.‭ ‬In that moment,‭ ‬all is well in your world.‭ ‬That long,‭ ‬long winter somehow pays off.‭ ‬All the washing,‭ ‬stripping,‭ ‬ greasing,‭ ‬paying,‭ ‬praying,‭ ‬twitching,‭ ‬freezing,‭ ‬doubting.‭ ‬All of it suddenly becomes worth it.‭

So what did I do when I got home?‭ ‬I put my mid winter gloves back in the draw of death for another two seasons.‭ ‬Threw in a couple of mid layers and dug out the Summer gloves while I was there.‭ ‬Then I lowered the screen on Wee Hamish and gave serious consideration to removing the PinLock insert from my visor.‭ ‬That's pretty much it,‭ ‬I was back at work the next day and the mornings aren't all that warm.‭

Of course being England,‭ ‬the forecast is for rain the next two day followed by the temperature dropping well into single digits.‭ ‬I'm guessing it'll just be me again for a few days then.‭ ‬Mustn't moan.‭

DIY Motorcycle Maintenance and Repairs

Our workshop in Bosnia.

I'm not the worlds worst amateur mechanic.‭ ‬Fact.‭ ‬You see,‭ ‬I have a certificate that says I am a qualified mechanic therefore technically I'm just a really terrible mechanic.‭ ‬I may be overstating the case but it's not by much.‭

Lifting a pack with a 434's crane. Got quite attached to that hulk.

It seems a long time ago now that I was an Army mechanic specialising in light armour.‭ ‬I've been up to my ears in oil and mud many times but I wouldn't claim to have been good at it.‭ ‬I was good at fault diagnosis but terrible at fixing things.‭ ‬Bolts would sheer off as soon as look at me while my tool box had an incredible ability to loose tools. Engineering hygine wasn’t my forte either.‭ ‬Fortunately,‭ ‬I got out of that line of work and into teaching which I'm better at though by how much is a matter for others to decide.‭

Now that I'm not employed as a VMii‭ (‬Vehicle Mechanic Class‭ ‬2‭) ‬I usually feel I should be doing more to keep up and refine the skills which I keep forgetting I never really had.‭ ‬Why‭? ‬The reasons are two fold really.

Firstly,‭ ‬pride.‭ ‬Put simply,‭ ‬when faced with a job that probably doesn't require specialised tools or an engineering degree,‭ ‬I can't help thinking I should be doing this for myself.‭ ‬Plenty of other people with no formal training seem able to look after their bike's every need.‭ ‬Should I not also be able to do so?‭ ‬It's a well known fact after all that people who don't change their own oil,‭ ‬overhaul their own suspension or fit new chains themselves aren't really real men.‭

At the dock yard on our way to Kosovo.

Secondly,‭ ‬as much as I love having a mechanic I know I can trust to look after my bike properly and not charge over the odds,‭ ‬fixing stuff yourself has its benefits.‭ ‬Firstly,‭ ‬you have more money left at the end of the day.‭ ‬Secondly,‭ ‬you don't have to drop it off or pick it up or wait for him to be available to work on it.‭ ‬Do your own brake job and you'll have those seals out,‭ ‬callipers nearly clean,‭ ‬resealed and refitted,‭ ‬breaks not quite bled properly and a few washers unexpectedly left over by four in the morning no problems.‭ ‬It's a no-brainer really.

At the end of the day,‭ ‬if you can do it and don't have money to burn,‭ ‬maintaining your own bike makes a lot of sense.‭

As I alluded to earlier though,‭ ‬I did a brake job on my bike.‭ ‬It badly needed doing because all three callipers were seized or seizing.‭ ‬However,‭ ‬the parts alone cost over‭ ‬£110.‭ ‬Despite having never had the pleasure of overhauling break callipers,‭ ‬I decided to go it alone.‭

What a mess.

Things went OK.‭ ‬It took probably ‬6‭ ‬hours of work to complete the overhaul (that doesn't include making brews, scratching heads, crawling all over looking for lost bits etc) and I learned a lot from doing it.‭ ‬I also made an unholy mess of my garage and got brake oil everywhere.‭ ‬The back brake was perfect when completed but the fronts wouldn't bleed.‭ ‬Following advice from a forum I eventually cable-tied the brake lever to the handlebars overnight holding the brakes on with what pressure there was.‭ ‬This as it turned out,‭ ‬ruins the brake lines.‭ ‬Even once Alan had bled them,‭ ‬they were still spongy.‭ ‬So a job almost well done,‭ ‬on an absolutely critical system.‭ ‬Ah heck,‭ ‬I wanted steel hoses anyway.‭ ‬The point is,‭ ten‬ hours of my life and it still had to go to Alan to finish the job.‭

In the past I've made a mess of all sorts of things,‭ ‬mainly because I didn't quite understand them.‭ ‬The YBR250‭ ‬killed its wheel bearings because I wasn't getting the chain adjustment quite right.‭ ‬I killed the chain on the GT250‭ ‬about the same way.‭ ‬How can a motorcyclist not be good at adjusting the chain‭? ‬Actually,‭ ‬looking at a lot of peoples bikes,‭ ‬they mostly just don't adjust or lube them.‭ ‬But for me,‭ ‬surely that's just unacceptable.‭

My bike getting the attention it deserves. Alan's.

There are other examples of my incompetence but I won't go into any more.‭ ‬The case for the prosecution is clearly made.‭ ‬I've been tried and found wanting.‭ ‬As I said in my last post,‭ ‬if I was rich,‭ ‬I would be paying Alan to come to ours weekly to maintain the fleet of motorbikes I would own.‭ ‬In order to satisfy my manly need to break things with tools,‭ ‬I would keep a simple old banger.‭
Unfortunately,‭ ‬this is not an option.‭ ‬Now I have a worrying situation with the Wee.‭ ‬It's Secondary Throttle Valve,‭ ‬or possibly the linkage,‭ ‬is seizing up.‭ ‬Alan got it going again with some duck oil last time he worked on it but they're sticking again now.‭ ‬Really,‭ ‬it needs removing,‭ ‬stripping and lubing properly.‭ ‬For Alan that would be a good two hours,‭ ‬maybe three.‭ ‬It needs a new air filter as well so while the box is out,‭ ‬it would be daft not to change that.‭ ‬The air filter I would do in a heartbeat.‭ ‬But me take my own throttle bodies off‭? ‬I think we both know that's not the best idea in the world.‭ ‬On the other hand,‭ ‬we've somehow ended up with two holidays to save for.‭ Oh, and the clutch is dragging a bit. ‬Now,‭ ‬where's the‭ ‬12mm spanner got to‭?

My Garage Wish List

The Kia Carens we are soon to live
without pictured behind the bike
we get to keep. 

Today we did something that seems pretty crazy. It would have seemed unthinkable not all that long ago. We signed an agreement to trade our Kia Carens 2.0CRDi for a slightly younger Fiat Panda 1.1 eco somthingorother. Why? Because when it comes down to it, I couldn’t care less about cars. Unlike riding, driving’s fine, but not a pleasure. Taking my children on holiday is a pleasure. Driving is just necessary and expensive. However, the Panda will be a grand a year less than the Carens yet will do 95% of the work just as well. I know my friends will laugh. They already have. But honestly, I just don’t care about cars.

The thing is, if tomorrow we won say £10 million, on the lottery, there would be a considerable time before I went car shopping. I do have a list of motorbikes I would be hunting down though and this blog is that list. It comes under three headings;

• Nostalgia
• Just Want One
• Bikes to Use Regularly.

Here goes (I apologise for repeating some things I mentioned in a previous post).

The Nostalga List

The Honda CB100n. My first bike. Bought for a song, simple and characterful. It had things like contact breakers and tappets that needed adjusting with a spanner. I’d use it as well. Actually I’d probably buy two or three of them and a Haynes manual as it would be the only bike I would work on if I had plenty of money. Other than that I’d be paying Alan to come to my garage every week to adjust chains, pull in for servicing and so on. The CB100N would be for me to satisfy my urge to get tool out and mess things up.

The Kawasaki GT550 was my first big bike and I loved it. That would need to be the later model and in red. I imagine I’d want to ride that as well. Being a shaft drive, Alan probably wouldn’t need to do much with it between services though as it would only go out on clean dry roads.

The BMW K75RT. In memory of the URide trip, this would need to be 1992 with a missing side panel and non functioning speedometer. Actually, I’d probably just ask Dan if I could buy his, get in covered in dust from the West Virginia dirt roads (assuming he has now washed it) then have it sealed in box and shipped over. Warts and all that one. Ride it? Probably. Alan would be splitting it ever few thousand miles to check the clutch splines though.

Just Want One

I’ve always wanted a Classic British bike and as a fan of little bikes it would have to be a BSA Bantam. Mine would be one of the 175cc bikes and the older the better really. Sure I’d ride it but it would probably do more miles on a trailer. It would spend most of it’s life in the living room next to the other bike under this heading, looking beautiful. Outings would be to steam rallies alongside the CB100N.

Only one manufacturer makes an engine which is a thing of beauty. I would have to have a naked Ducati of some sort. It wouldn’t be for riding. In fact, I may even leave one side pristine and then cut up the other side to expose some of it’s inner beauty. Exactly which one I’m open to suggestions on.

Bike To Use Regularly

First up, Mine. I’m not going to get rid of my Wee! It would just get all those suspension upgrades I’m always wishing I could afford. I might put a full luggage system on as well. This would be the most used bike right through all four seasons. I’d put pure road touring tyres on it as well (in fact, that’s probably gonna happen anyway).

I’d like a CRF250. The rooftop chase in Skyfall was amazing and I really would like to have a go at off-roading one day. I’ve also spent a lot of my riding life on 250s so it would be wrong not to have one. This would probably get used just as a local run about as well as for light green-laning. Not so much with the roof to chases though. 

I would like a big tourer. I loved Dan’s RT but I like the idea of a modern boxer. We would want something super comfortable for good long trips two up. The R1200RT would make plenty of sense. I would probably use it two or three times a year. However, all my mates who ride would know it was available to them for when they want to go two up touring.

If we won today, Ang would probably want to keep her YBR125. Just maybe she would consider swapping it for a CBR125. Either way, we wouldn’t be without a bike suited to a pair of L plates. When Ang does get her full licence, she fancies a Triumph Street Triple. Actually, we can’t get rid of the YBR. We’ve already promised Mummy's red bike to Beth.

The final bike is a request from Beth. She wants a side car outfit so she can go with me on rideouts. Having followed redlegsrides as he explores snowy mountain roads aboard his Ural Patrol rig, I’m slightly taken with the idea. If it means I could share the pleasures of riding with my children while they are still young, I’d have one in a heart beat. While the Ural rigs are kin of cool, thanks to Wallace and Gromit, ours would probably be an Enfield Bullet with Watsonian Squire side car.

Of course, there would be a few other little bikes for the kids. A reasonable selection of electric bikes, crossers and mini-motos would be available for fun and frolics with friends.

With a garage like this, heated, clean, brightly lit with a good size screen playing all my favourite videos on a loop, hot tea and comfy seats, it would be a great place to just sit and be. When friends come round, they could choose one of mine or ride their own. It’s good to share. With ten of the above bikes available for road use, there'd be plenty to choose from. I’m not sure Kev would be tempted off his trusty CBR600F with a CB100N or even a shiny new CRF250 but you never know. The choice would be there. And, if it’s too wet get them to ride, we could just chill amongst the bikes, drink brews, natter and be.

So now I’ve got my wish list sorted out, I just need to wait for my numbers to come up, preferably after a few weeks of roll-over. Don’t worry though. I’m not holding my breath. Besides, I’m already a lucky man. Two of those bikes are in my garage and right now they are both running beautifully. Another is in my brother’s on the other side of the Atlantic, available if we want it.

The point is, there's no car in my dream garage. There would be some car. Probably a small some car for getting about and a bigger some car for getting more/bigger things about. The bigger some car would be for towing bikes mainly. They can live on the drive or stuck out on the road for all I care. Car just move stuff and people. Bikes move me. Bring on the Panda.

Not this one exactly but it looks a lot like it. Just some car to do the job.